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many emotions...venting 
  ariawannbe
 
06:46pm 02/10/2008
  I met this guy 3 years ago but we began dating around the 4th of July. We started out be really really good friends. I believe we sometimes see someone and want there to be a connection so badly that we sort of make it happen but tell ourselves it was natural. This guy (we'll call him Tom)is a bit older than me and wasn't my ideal kind of guy at first but he became my total buddy. Our relationship was based on trust and respect and on a smaller level still is. Though at the begining I did notice that he only had one friend (besides me)that consisted of 95% of his social life and it had probably been that way for a while. In the back of my mind I kept wondering if the way he at times seemed to be...I guess obsessed it to strong of a word but I would wonder if I was mostly a ticket out of his loneliness but how could I find that out for sure? Anyways about 2 months later he became more comfortable in letting his temper tantrums/way to gain control show. When he would do something I disagreed with and I would say it would try to always get really mad at any tiny thing I disagreed with and try to intimidate me into biting my tongue when I felt he wasn't treating me right or I disagreed. He does this every time we are together. Sometimes he'll drag it out but it seems when he has something to gain than he cuts it short.Though he shows that he has a lot of love for me. I know your probably thinking yeah you just want to believe that but I could tell that he wasn't faking how strongly he felt towards me by the people closest to him. If he really cherishes me why the tantrums that pulls us apart? How can someone do both to someone? Is it b/c he knows I'll keep coming back? Which I think is a strong possibility but if that is the case I still don't get it. I was curious what other people thought about the situation.  
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  caramellatta
 
06:29pm 31/08/2008
  As much as I love my boyfriend, his spirituality sometimes makes me sad.
Why do lovers of the soul look down on the body and its desires?

We both live in a very conventional, sexually-repressed society, and he used to live in one that was even more extreme. He's a devoted bahaii, and he's very sensitive to the boundaries set by religion and society. My family is an overprotective, conventional one, and although I can't afford to be liberal in practice, I am one in thought and in principle. To him, he won't touch me because he respects me. He judges people who are physical with each other. He looks down on a relationship that includes sexual intimacy. He doesn't drink. I try my best to understand all of that, because I know where he comes from, how and where he was raised, and what he believes in. But it's very hard for me because I feel like I've been forced into a vow of celibacy. I don't wanna sleep with him- I would be a victim of an honor murder if I did that, but sometimes it's hard for me to not want to be physically intimate in a way or another. And I can never tell him that because I fear he would disrespect me. To him, the body is sinful, dirty, a weakness to be overcome, and he would never use someone he loves to fulfill his sexual needs. He wants to rise above his desires. To me, I can only do that by giving in to them. He wouldn't understand that sex is not just a lowly need but that it can be an expression of love, of wanting to merge, to let down all guards and completely share oneself. He thinks of me as an angel, the embodiment of innocence, and although I am practically innocent and have never been sexually active, I'm far from that in my mind. It's so hard to keep him out of my head when I take myself to places. It's so hard to ignore the butterflies that travel down from my stomach when we're close. He scorns homosexuality, and I can never share with him the fact that I desire women both physically and emotionally. And because I can't get anything from him, I've been thinking about women more and more lately. Any of these confessions would turn me into a bitch in his eyes. He loves me, and I love him so much with all our differences, but I am a body, and my body desires him. And I don't know what to do about it.
 
 
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Dieta y acné: Usted es lo que usted come  
  lavez8796
 
07:09pm 20/08/2008
 


Mucha gente intentará un arsenal de productos para intentar y para librarse de acné. Pero usted no necesita utilizar los artículos de tocador o los cosméticos costosos para ayudar a acné. Hay algunas cosas básicas que usted puede hacer para ayudar a aclarar acné y a calmar la piel abajo. En primer lugar comience con un régimen de la limpieza que usted hace diario. Terminantemente manteniendo la piel limpia, entonándole de limpiamiento e hidratando ayudará a su acné. Usted pone necesidad del ’ t de utilizar los productos muy costosos para esto; apenas limpiando y entonando su piel diaria debe ayudar con su acné.

Recuerde siempre que todos los productos del acné comprados sobre el contador contienen los productos químicos y pueden tener resultados desastrosos si están utilizados en los tipos incorrectos de la piel. Antes de emprender cualquier tratamiento usando estos productos es importante leer la etiqueta cuidadosamente y entender los riesgos implicados. Su tez es muy delicada y cualquier resultado dañoso de medicaciones inadecuadas aparecerá decididamente. El facial que marca con una cicatriz es ciertamente algo ser evitado a toda costa.

Alguna gente requerirá medicaciones de acné porque una enfermedad más seria es la razón de su problema del acné. Los remedios caseros para el acné con dieta pueden aliviar muchos de sus brotes porque somos verdad lo que comemos. Si los ojos son la ventana al alma entonces la piel es una reflexión de su salud total así que el principio de una curación verdadera empieza con dentro.

El tratamiento del laser de Nlite es una ayuda posible para los que muy sean preocupadas por sus cicatrices del acné. Aunque el coste de este tratamiento no sea todavía definido, cuente con que este retiro de la cicatriz del acné sea muy costoso. ¡Pero si usted tiene el dinero a pasar en esta clase de tratamiento, después porqué no intento él! No ha habido ninguna informes para ningún efecto secundario áspero de este retiro de la cicatriz del acné. Si usted es la clase de persona que pasará con cualquier cosa apenas tener esa piel sin defectos usted el ’ VE que quiere, ésta puede ser la respuesta a ese sueño. Pero si usted duda este tratamiento y un poco asustado en experimentar procesos médicos, todavía hay los productos del retiro de la cicatriz del acné para los cuales esté disponible cualquier tipo de problema del acné usted está teniendo. Los tratamientos del retiro de la cicatriz del acné pueden ser muy costosos

La tensión no causa acné. Tensione es una parte de nuestras vidas de cada día y cree que o no no es un factor que contribuye al acné que reside en su cara. Solamente la tensión severa trató por el doctor puede hacer acné entrar en erupción y entonces solamente como un efecto secundario de las drogas que una persona puede tomar. Si éste es el caso, consulte a su doctor inmediatamente.

El primer paso que una víctima del acné debe tomar es venir a los términos con su condición. Tendrá un impacto negativo en su vida porque nuestra sociedad nos juzga por nuestro aspecto. El truco es que una víctima del acné no necesita hacer frente a este solo. Piense en los números mencionados en los affectos del acné del “ del Home Page cerca de el 80% de todo el ” de los adolescentes. Eso significa que es ocho fuera de cada diez personas alrededor de usted o ha tenido que luchar con acné y sus impactos sociales negativos. Ponga tan el ’ t sea tímido informar e implicar a gente que usted entra en el contacto con para evitar que el marcar con una cicatriz psicologico llegue a ser permanente.




Sobre el autor: El autor, Sarah Rodas, sufrida de acné durante muchos años antes finalmente de descubrir una curación que trabaja. Usted puede leer sobre ella y aprender el tratamiento casero secreto del acné que se garantiza para trabajar sin los doctores, las prescripciones, o los productos legales. Visite por favor el blog de Sarah: acne-3-day-cure.info




I like it - Weight Loss Supplements
what is the best treatment for a problem with ear wax hardening
 
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  plsmachic
 
11:23pm 30/09/2004
 
mood: scared
I need help.

To make a long story short... I just got out of a 3 year abusive relationship, which left me the single mother of one wonderful little boy, Aidan (he'll be 2 in November). Paying for diapers, groceries, etc. wasn't a problem while I was in the relationship, but for my own health I had to get out of that.

Now, my problem is, I'm working, but I can't afford diapers, food, warm clothes, or anything I need for my son. I can barely afford the gas money to get to work, on top of babysitting $ and food.

I guess what I'm asking, and I'm sorry if I'm coming off sounding like a beggar... but if there is anyone out there who is better off than I am, if you could help me out in any way, I'd be VERY thankful. I don't have much support from my family and I really don't have any friends who could help me out, most of them are younger than I am anyways.

This is my last resort. If you could please help me, my email is plsmachic@excite.com, or I could email you if you comment with your email address.

Again, I'm sorry for asking, I just don't know where else to turn.

~* Laura *~
 
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sappy pathetic lil me 
  too_many_stars
 
03:10pm 26/02/2004
 
mood: distressed
Ok..i was/am in a long distant relationship...and i thought i was being lied to cause the guy did mess up but i found out(he met a girl in a chat got drunk and slept with her and regreted it and he's had feeling for another girl once before), so i wasn't sure if he was still being true to me..and that's all i ever wanted, lets call the man i love A. So what do? I figure why should i be sad when he's not being true..so i happen to find someone eles on here and started talkin to them lets call him B..at first it was just jokin around..then i actually started caring for b and he really cared for me, and i thought hmm..maybe i should keep this up until i find out if A is really being true to me..anyways it went to far.. B always knew about A, but A never knew about B until recently..and now A hates my guts and wishes i would die and i hate my guts too considering i just did what i had always feared was being done to me. Anyways..i stopped talking to B for A and i showed him EVERYTHING I SAID TO B even thought i knew it would hurt him and cause him to reall hate me, he wanted to see and i wanted to be truthful, well he does hate me and he wishes i was dead and that he never met me i'm a slut and ignorant bitch to him, but i still LOVE him, i mean i know how i could i even had talked to that other guy for 5months and not let A known about it, i really don't know, and i did umm..well let it get "sexual" i guess..i don't know why..but i fucked up and i hate myself..and i just want A to love me again:(..Do you think he will? Do ou think i should die? i don't even know what i'm asking i'm gettin sick from this..i really regret it..:(
 
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  xbrookiex
 
10:18pm 08/10/2003
  Hey----------sorry I haven't been all that active. I have had a lot to do lately. I'm leaving tomorrow for Tennessee---12 hour drive...ugh....and I won't be back until sometime Monday, so I won't be on until then. But, when I do get back, I will be able to post :)  
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  youmakethecall
 
01:13am 02/10/2003
  muchlikesuffocating
muchlikesuffocating
much like suffocating

send the p a i n below


[ican'tfeelmychest]
 
     Post
 
there's something weird in my head. 
  youmakethecall
 
12:55pm 24/09/2003
 
mood: content
last night i ate two suckers.
alksjdflkjggfhjl
i fucking suck.
then the boyfriend and i talked about things again.
you know, about how i suck.
and he broke up with me.
but not because he wanted to end the relationship, because "neither one of us was going to change and we can't avoid/ignore it so the only option left..."
fuckme.
then we cried together.
then he told me he loved me.
and he wanted this to work.
and that "i love you too much to give up on you, fucker!" hahah no it was cute.
and he said we'd get through this together no matter how long it took because he LOVED me.
holyshit. that's a nice feeling. that's all i wanted in the first place was for him to not support me being mia, but at least be there for me. listen to me when i talk. tell me i'm okay when i'm sad. tell me he loves me when i don't love myself.
and he did just that.
all of last night.
he said i was perfect.
he said i was beautiful and "sexy as fuck" and i didn't need to lose a pound.
he said he dated a grrl before who was 5'8" and 115 lb and it was disgusting. i told him that was hot.
because it is.
i told him i'd like to be at least 110.
he freaked out but said only because he was worried about me.
i don't want him to worry about me.
i don't want to change.
he said he'd rather i fast than than puke because it's somewhat of a healthier alternative.
hahah ok.
but yeah.
i love him so fucking much.
i really almost fucked up a perfect thing.
and that would suck.
anyhow.
i keep getting dizzy and i'm really shaky. i have to sit down and take lotsa rests and stuff. it's odd but i like it.
12:50pm, september 24, i am starting my fast. i don't know yet how long it will be going for.
CW: 143 lb.
STG: 123lb.
LTG: 110lb.
wish me luck guys.
i only have less than two months to achieve this because that is when i go to california and see the boy. ohman.
then it's bonysexlikewoah. HAHAH <33
i had my mom buy all of my clothes she gave me for my birthday teo sizes too small so i would HAVE to lose weight to wear them. it works for me. .. so yeah.
i'm excited. i can fit into them now, they're just snug. and noone likes a fat grrl in tight jeans.
my legs are sore as fuck from the grind workout from yesterday and the yoga i started but that's good because that means it's working.
weeeeeeeeeh! i still prefer the treadmill. i sweat more.
anyway.
i love you guys.
pleasepleaseplease wish me luck on the fast. i've never done this before.
you can join me if you want.
xo.
charlie
 
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it's too bad it's not my style 
  youmakethecall
 
11:02pm 22/09/2003
 
mood: content
what have i gotten myself into, maybe has been slicing inches from my waist...

i wanna say thankyou to everyone who replied to my previous post.
today was better.
i ate a small bowl of cereal (with soymilk) for breakfast.
1 cup of pineapple for lunch.
and 1 cup of pasta (no meat) and 1 serving garlic bread for dinner. haha i'm such a tubbo. anyhow.
i went out with my friend tonight. she's sort of heavier. a couple hundred pounds heavier.
she stopped at two fast food joints and tried to stop at TCBY to get me to eat sorbet. but i stood strong.
i ate a couple tictacs and nothing else. it was nice.
i actually feel hungry and i love it.
it somehow makes me feel stronger, and more confident.
i didn't throw up once today. i didn't have the chance.
i don't like to do it while alexis is around and my family was here all day and i'm not ready to deal with the bullshit from them if they find out.
but to show you how my weight fluxuates, i weighed myself tonight.
i'm two pounds heavier than this morning.
but hey, it IS the end of the day. and i'm on my period.
bleh.
tomorrow i will do so much better and even better the day after that so i'm satisfied.
i walked/ran 40 min. on the treadmill but no crunches tonight.
grossgrossgross.
anyhow.
i guess that's all.
xo kids <3
 
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.. 
  youmakethecall
 
01:34pm 22/09/2003
 
mood: anxious
hi gals. (and guys?)
i'm charlie. i'm new.
i'm hella chubby and i'm bulimic.
make sense? probably not to anyone but all of you.
i just wanted a place with some friends to be able to vent my frustrations to about my disorder, habits, weight, calorie intake, etc.
in the same boat? you should message me.
my aim is
PukeHoneymoon
hahah how fitting, right?
anyhow here is my dilema:
i'm 5'3". 21yrs old. 143lbs.
i am the queen of binging and puking, but here is the difficult side: i'm a nursing mother. for those of you who aren't familiar:
i'm breastfeeding a 13 month old baby grrl.
meaning, she takes/needs nutrition from myself.
my lowest weight (this year) has been 130lbs. i used to excercize obsessively. i ate healthy. then some things happened and i got really stressed out. i quit my routine. i eat EVERYthing.
uh it's horrible. i got back up to 150 but i'm slowly starting to lose again. but i'm throwing up all the time. :\
aslkfjsdlfgj
any advice? any tips? i don't know. i just feel like i'm alone.
xo.
charlie
 
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finally joining these things 
  youmakethecall
 
01:32pm 22/09/2003
 
mood: anxious
hi gals. (and guys?)
i'm charlie. i'm new.
i'm hella chubby and i'm bulimic.
make sense? probably not to anyone but all of you.
i just wanted a place with some friends to be able to vent my frustrations to about my disorder, habits, weight, calorie intake, etc.
in the same boat? you should message me.
my aim is
PukeHoneymoon
hahah how fitting, right?
anyhow here is my dilema:
i'm 5'3". 21yrs old. 143lbs.
i am the queen of binging and puking, but here is the difficult side: i'm a nursing mother. for those of you who aren't familiar:
i'm breastfeeding a 13 month old baby grrl.
meaning, she takes/needs nutrition from myself.
my lowest weight (this year) has been 130lbs. i used to excercize obsessively. i ate healthy. then some things happened and i got really stressed out. i quit my routine. i eat EVERYthing.
uh it's horrible. i got back up to 150 but i'm slowly starting to lose again. but i'm throwing up all the time. :\
aslkfjsdlfgj
any advice? any tips? i don't know. i just feel like i'm alone.
xo.
charlie
 
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To whom it may concern... 
  sepsis_dna
 
01:37pm 23/03/2003
 


I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.I'm not enough.

I belong to no one, least of all myself.

 
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  iamconfused1286
 
06:12pm 19/02/2003
 
mood: blah
Well... here's my first problem...

I have some friends who shall remain anonymous, and I'm not even gonna say anything to describe them, who are having some hard times... and I just don't know how to help them. What I want to do is just going to make them mad. I want to show them verses in the bible I think would help... but I know that they will just twist it all around and it will end up bad.

So that's it. I'm done now.
 
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  xbrookiex
 
05:10pm 18/02/2003
  Hello! Welcome to this new community!! Feel free to vent as you please or ask questions and they will be answered as well as possible, also, try to get your friends to join!

Rules will be posted on the info page when it can be done, which should be very soon. :)
 
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